Knowing fully that what she and her fellow Democrat Congressional cast members had promised was a far cry from the end product produced late Saturday night, Ms. Pelosi flashed her polished dentures with confidence and convincingly told her audience she had delivered what America really needed. This sterling performance was delivered by the same staunch supporter of a women’s right to choose who signed off on a bill that would deny poor women access to an abortion on any government backed plan. Apparently, Nancy’s years of hamming for the cameras allowed her to harness her acting skills such that she could use them with the efficiency of a battery powered strap-on to screw women like a man. (Okay, so they’ll only appreciate that one in San Francisco.) Not to be outdone, the Republican’s John “limp boner” Boehner appeared on cue, hitting his marks like a seasoned pro, starring in his own press conference. With his perfectly coiffed hair and Hollywood tan, he predictably denounced his Democrat rival’s success with the usual dog-eared script of tax and spend and big government takeover of healthcare. Unfortunately, Mr. Boehner was clearly the lesser of the two performers. Having been saddled with little more than the usual Republican key word laced presentations, he smartly took advantage of the Washington prop department, hoisting the 1,990 plus paged healthcare bill to aid in his all too transparent and disingenuous rant.

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