2012-02-13 1st journal, Mayan day 4 StarTranscript http://www.scribd.com/doc/81667113Intro:I don't know what to say, here. I don't feel like the same person who last journaled, here. Well, I do but I don't. Identity is morphing, again – or still. I don't know. More and more that's what I can say about so many things – I don't know.This isn't bad or negative in any way – just awkward at times – like times when I try to carry on with some habit or other – such as journaling. I have to be sure it's okay with the new whoever-I-am, first, before I proceed. Do you understand?I no longer care if anyone can follow where I am going. My eyes are less and less on others, more and more focused elsewhere, focused within. I'm not sure what I'm seeing there, but I do feel the self pulling more and more out of the world and its concerns. It came to me just yesterday or recently that I have no interest in anything at all in life with one exception: these journals. There is quite literally nothing I give a damn about “out there.” This is strange, for the body has relatives, has a child, a grown daughter, even. There is simply no concern, no visible attachment to any of that, nor to things in any way.The whole life has gone within, now. Lest someone think I'm claiming some sort of spiritual state or other, think again, or rather look again, only from heart. What there is, here, is a mirror for you or for anyone. We're all the same. Actually, we're all non-existent, but that's another matter we will leave alone for now... Less